If you ain’t first, you’re last. Well I definitely wasn’t first.
I signed up for my first cyclocross race over the weekend. It was my first race, period, actually. I went in with like a tiny bit of training so I could get off and on the bike, and that’s about it. I did exactly as well as I expected to: came dead fucking last (DFL).
And you know what? That’s pretty much ideal for me.
If you look at my Instagram bio, it says “Take Care, Ride Slowly.” That bit of wisdom came from my old boss Hu Bin, who told it to me after I locked up the shop one night. I’ll probably get it tattooed somewhere at some point. Anyway, I don’t really like riding my bike fast. The reason I signed up for this in the first place was the experience.
I went to watch a race last year, and then told myself that the punk scene of the cross race was so much fun that I had to come back and give it a try a year later. I retrofitted myself a bike, signed up, tested a few things out and then found myself lining up for a start.
Then I was pretty much immediately at the back, and didn’t make up any ground.
The thing about it is, someone had to be last, and just going out and trying something is the reason that these events exist. It’s the countless non-pro riders who come out, drink the weird hand ups, heckle, wipe out, get dusty and have a good time that makes this sport happen, and I’m proud to count myself among them.
Back in the day, I was a pretty fast swimmer — like among the top in my province. So I had a pretty big ego in high school. This was a completely different experience. I was out of my element, untrained, unprepared and utterly stoked the whole time. Even crossing the line last, I had a huge smile and was loving every minute of it.
I also won “Last not Lapped,” which was pretty sick.
So I’m not going to make this a regular thing. I’ll keep my “Take Care, Ride Slowly” mantra going. I’ll probably do one of these per year, just to keep myself honest.
I was last, but somebody had to be.
Might as well be me!
Lots of photos from the race, check em out above!